Wow, I can't believe it's been over an year since we're married!
They say couples change after marriage, after all change is part of life! It is said in Telugu and I translate, "Six months of living together makes him her and makes her him". Living together brings lots of change in life, both spouses adjust to accommodate each other's habits into their joint life. Even without realizing, we lend some habits, and borrow some. :-)
I feel like I have been in this relation for so long because:
1. We're both done with the habit exchange:
It is so funny, when we were newly married, I was a no-chillies-zone, and husband was a no-Non-Indian-food-zone, in fact an I-prefer-Telugu-food-zone.
Now, husband loves pasta, and I adore Aavakaaya! Now he begs me to please not eat so much green chilli chutney because it's bad for health. And several times, he requested me to cook pasta, noodles, he loves my Gujarati daal, lobia... I have changed too, I learnt how to make upma, sambar, charu, all to get his attention ;-)
But all that experimentation happens in the first year of marriage, you're changed enough by the end of the year, and now I can hear him say, "O I don't like moong daal, I only like Mudda pappu". :-D And I can hear myself say, "If you don't like halva, don't eat it, I am going to make it for myself". :-D
2. Every husband greatly admires his newly wed wife's cooking, it is amazing, it is out of this world, wow, how talented my wife is. Even the wife is very excited to try out new stuff & please her husband. Now, we're more into, "It's your turn to cook, no, it's your turn, no don't make that same thing again," etc... :-D And, if I make something new, like I made kajjikayalu the other day, I get the reaction, "O this must be easy right?" :-))
3. Earlier, my husband had the interest to read, react & comment on everything I wrote, now he's least bothered about reading anything that I write out, probably because now he's finished "phasaoing" me? ;-) He's not peeped into my blog even once, imagine! Whereas if this had been before our wedding, husbandji would have filled up my blog with his comments, hehehe. Also, now that I am so close by, he finds me less intelligent, less practical and more stubborn. ;-)))))))
4. All married men suffer from the syndrome of not being able to remember dates. My darling husband had an early onset of that disease, he couldn't remember dates even while we were engaged, but he's totally gone overboard now! Earlier, he used to remember the year, month and week, he was only confused about the exact date. Now, he can't even recollect the year or the month! O MY GOD :-)) I shouldn't be too surprised if he forgets our wedding anniversary & birthdays by next year. :-P
5. I was being a very good wifey doing ALL the housework. Husband was being a very good hubbie sincerely offering to do ALL the housework, while I refused his help, and he insisted on helping me. Now, we've exchanged roles, I am ready to let him do it, and he only offers half heartedly. :-D In fact, I have delegated some chores exclusively to him, and he's delegated some exclusively to me.
6. I realized the other day, that this year, it will be 10 years since we first met, 5 years since we expressed love, 4 years since we asked our parents for consent, 2 years since our wedding. Wow, so many years, that makes "US" sound old! :-P And of course, going by point number 4, I am the only one keeping count, husbandji won't remember most of the dates! :-))
7. We're done with exchanging all the family stories and gossips that tail a wedding.
8. A newly married couple's house is full of new things. Our house seems to be full of aging old things now, the utensils are no longer shiny, we've had a few replacements/repairs/maintenance, a lease renewal, a broken cup, all these things are reminders of time passing by!
9. Newly married couples have sooo much to talk about, especially if the wifey is a chatterbox like me and the hubbie is a self-proclaimed-philosopher like mine. I think we're done with that phase, now one of us reads a book while the other is busy on the laptop or studying or cooking. And imagine, there is cricket in our lives now, hubbie insists on watching cricket on some weekends!! Actually I still believe we talk a lot more than ordinary couples, because I am one big yackity yack yack. But we're back to our earlier routine of being book-worms. Books made us friends, books drew us together, we dumped the books for a while, but we're back to them now.
All in all, I must say, the first few years before & after marriage are the best part of life! It is so nice to know every morning when I wake up, that I am somebody's world, and somebody's my world.
If I had to power to rewind/fast-forward/replay my life, I would replay these parts of life again and again! :-)
As we grow older and look back on our lives, these are the parts of life that we recollect, how it was to be in love, how it was to get married, how it was when we started a journey in togetherness. Just like I always asked my mommy how she felt when she first saw papa, and how papa felt when he first met mommy, and how they both felt when they were newly married, and how they felt when they knew of my existence...hmmmm.
Mommy joked that I would forget her after my wedding, as I would be busy living my own life. But I recollect her every moment, now that I experience the joys that she experienced once upon a time! It's every woman's story. I think of how my mom-in-law must have felt thirty years ago when she was a newly wed daughter-in-law. It is amusing, how we start life with a new family name, but it becomes our own with time, and we become part of the culture it carries.
Once upon a time, my mother-in-law & I started life in different families, today we both share the same family name, and the love for the dear sweet fellow who links both of us.
I think I inherited this thinking gene from mom. :-O
No comments:
Post a Comment